2009 started on a splendid note.
I was now living alone in Mumbai. For the first time ever in my life, there was nobody when I got home. As a kid in Bhopal there were Parents and my Bro all the time; not to forget the constant presence of very close relatives. In college there was that quintessential group of jerkoff friends who were always there. In Calcutta, there was Thakur Saab, and then the amigos from EE-146. Even in Mumbai, there was the Kandiwali phase for few days.
Living alone is commonplace in western countries, but kind of rare in India. Maybe it has to do with costs of living alone. Or maybe because living with friends is so much fun. Generally, in India we go from
Living with Parents --->>> Living with Friends --->>> Living with wife and own family
Even I happened live alone accidentaly by a set of peculiar circumstances.
Living alone is weird in a few ways. You are responsible for everything. You have to do everything. You have to Plan for everything. All the bills, all the work to be done in the house, regular maintenance. And suddenly, there is so much time ....
It is an all together different level of personal growth. It pushed me out of my comfort zone like never before. I liked it, because it forced me to exercise my foresight, and be aware of everything. Everthing has to be done by you, and you only. Eventually, I even had to shun my regular maid, and start taking care of the whole house all by myself; end to end stuff. Well, I do get a daily worker twice a month for cleaning, laundry and washing. Apart from that, I am on my own.
This has put me in predicament a few times; as this means if I don't move, nothing gets done. Period. Everything is completely up to me. The house has had all kinds of looks over these months now; from a disgusting bachelor's den to a sparking hotel room. Most of the times, it lies somewhere in the middle.
I got a huge scare when I had viral Flu in mid August. That was the toughest time I faced here. All alone, very weak, the antibiotics kill all appetite, news channels blaring the advance of Swine Flu in India, the fact that I couldn't even call others to meet as Flu is contagious, no laptop or TV as they strained eyes and gave me a killer headache.
I have done a lot of work here. I supervised the white-wash of the whole house before I moved in. There have been a four huge plumbing jobs done. This includes twice the overflowing of sink from the sink water of the flats above due to choking of the pipe below.
I also bought lots of stuff on my own for the house. A refrigerator, LCD, Set top box, lots of Kitchenware, furniture etc etc. It was the first time in my life when I did so much of market research across so many things for stuff to be bought for me with my own money.
I have also started working in the kitchen. I make quite a few regular things nowadays. I have realised that standing there and cooking isn't a pain for me at all. I will never cook regularly as such, but I think I like it as a great way of breaking the monotonous routine. I take my Lappy in there, put on some stuff and just have some fun.
Another thing I've experienced since moving here is the arrival of "Guests". There is a regular flow of people in my house, usually for a day or two. Quite a times because I stay close to the Airport. Few are relatives, mostly they are friends. It's funny how I perceive my own house entirely differently just before the guest is about to come. Of Course, the perception heavily depends on who the guest is. Almost all of them point out things around the house, mostly good, few bad. Everyone gives suggestions. I listen to them all, patiently. Eventually, the changes I make to the overall scheme of things depends on one single fact; this house, and everything within should suit me.
Living alone gives a lot of time for yourself. If I actually list down the things I have been able to do because of this uninterrupted time for myself, it would be a different blog in itself. To summarise, I've read around 30 books last year (Notable being Kane and Abel, The Lost symbol, Imagining India, Shantaram), seen 8 new TV Shows and tonnes of movies. I get to study more as well, as there are no distractions when you feel like studying.
Lot of friends ask me, don't u feel bored and lonely. Well, it was a bit awkward initially, but I have always felt short of time for so much stuff I like to do other than work. Once you have so much to occupy yourself, it really isn't that hard. Weekdays I am in office around 10 hours. So, I love the peace, quiet and solitude once I get home. And on weekends, It's me who is out most of the time. Either at some friend's/cousin's place, maybe out of station, or someone comes over to my house. It was surprising to find out how most people are uncomfortable when left all to themselves on a regular basis. I read this line on some other blog,"The solution to loneliness is not in seeking a company. The solution to loneliness is in – not minding being lonely."
I feel everyone should stay alone at least for a few months. The sooner we start it, the better. It's a fascinating journey of self discovery.
3 comments:
We should have a 'like' button in blogs :)
Wish to write a similar blog, soon. :)
I envy you. This always occurs to me. I try hard to give myself time with no one around, which is why I have started getting up earlier than others in the morning, and started reading books, but living alone, will be a different thing altogether thing. I have to always think of others before I play loud music. When I am reading or studying, and someone plays loud music, its again pain. But, this is India, and adjustment is everything. Hopefully, I will have my solitude someday.
one should have onough breathingspace in his or her life wheather living with friends, parents or spouse to know one's self. yeah, this should not lead to loneliness. u are a avid readerso keep it up as nothing can compensate for true knowledge. luv vasudha
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